Zackary · Marshall

((Funnily enough, woman's clothing doesn't bother Zack that much. Or rather, the idea of wearing the exact same thing that he normally wears (slacks, a belt, and a button down shirt) but purchased from the other side of the clothing store doesn't bother him (and new sneakers and a bra are a necessary evil, due to the fact that otherwise exercise is not a happy fun experience). A dress, skirt, pantyhose, or anything remotely feminine would bother him. It's mostly due to the fact Zack's neat-freak nature (his clothing better FIT, darn it) overwhelms his American-male desire to NOT BE A SISSY*.

* Zack, I'd make a comment here, considering you are such a geek it's not funny. On the other hand, you could (but won't) also beat up most normal people, and have several of the hallmarks of a Badass (a katana, a motorcycle, and a trenchcoat -- lack the attitude).

I also have a feeling showers are going to involve severe ignoring of exactly what he's washing. I've yet to figure out how Zack's sexuality transfered over (whether he still likes women, or whether he's stills straight), besides that it's still in the 'Swore not to, so go away' category. It's not horribly important, since Zack's practically asexual anyway (if I were mean, I'd change that.) ))

There are times when I wonder what my world would have been like had the Empire not invaded and set up their puppet government, whether things would have been better. This is NOT one of them. I pray this is a spoof, or that cooler heads will give this the righteous smackdown it deserves.

Sometimes I wonder whether these people slept through the important bits of Sunday school and only paid attention for the blood and the battles and the smiting in the Old Testament. What part of 'love thy neighbor as thyself' do these people not get? Is 'do unto others...' that hard of a concept for them? Do they think a God that professes to love everyone -- not just the Protestants, not just the Christians, not just the heterosexuals, not just the devout, not just the Americans, everyone -- would be happy about this?

I wouldn't want to live under a theocracy, because I value my ability to choose my religion. Yes, I may choose wrongly, but I was given the choice by God. I wouldn't force anyone else to live under one because I don't want to live under one. I respect the boundaries of my fellow people and am respectful of their religious beliefs because I would like them to respect mine, no matter how silly my beliefs sound to them.

I am a priest, yes, but that doesn't mean I can force march someone down my path -- I am a guide, I can point out the signs, and offer advice through the rough patches of the path I'm on, I can tell those that are lost or uncertain where my path is and how to walk it, but I can't make someone walk my path if they don't want to. It would do more harm than good -- I've seen a lot of people develop a knee-jerk reaction to my religion because of people who tried to force them into it. Even if you believe yours is the only correct path, telling people they are going the wrong way is unhelpful unless they are starting to think so too. Threatening them moreso. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. You can tell people about your religion, but all the bibles and signs and pamphlets in the country won't make them believe. What forms belief is being open and honest and supportive of those that are looking for it -- and polite and friendly to those who aren't looking at the moment. Actually, those things are good things to be regardless.

For all the soul-searching I've done, for all the sleepless nights I spent believing that if I died, I was certain to go to Hell, for all the times I was lost and confused because I couldn't find the right choice, and I felt like I was completely alone... I would rather suffer the rest of my life trying to pick my way through the uncertain sea than have the smug self-satisfied certainty of these people who never question that their own narrow-minded short-sighted view of the Almighty is the correct one. Strong faith is not formed by never asking questions -- it's formed by asking questions and getting lost, but always finding your way back to the same lantern guidepost.

(Written in Zack's journal -- he will share this if asked)

Since someone asked about Lent around the Nexus, I thought it would be a good time to set down my own beliefs.

I am a Christian. I was Catholic -- a priest in fact, if you couldn't tell -- and I... well, I might still be. It's hard to say when in my universe, the Vatican is a smoking crater and the Church hierarchy is in ruins.

I know I'm a mystic of some sort -- the magic belies that. And, yes, I know the line about witches -- it's a bit of a problematic translation, since the word 'witch' originally implied bad intent, and now, it, well it doesn't. I do believe that God gives me this power -- I've been told as much. So, using it is not a sin as long as I use it well.

I also know that most others consider me very liberal. For the record, I don't think homosexuality is a sin -- interesting fact: the passage in Leviticus refers to male prostitutes, so really shouldn't be used as a blanket condemnation of homosexuality. I think -- I've been told -- that there are multiple paths to God in this life. I know I'm on one of the right ones, and will happily help others walk it. I'm not going to tell others that they are on the wrong ones. Well, overdosing on drugs or other self-destructive behavior might be an exception to that rule, but that's more because I do think life is sacred.

Which is another thing. I do believe in an afterlife. I do think that if I follow my path, I will go to Heaven. I haven't really thought about where others go when they die. I only know that it would eventually be Hell for me, though for others it may be Paradise. What can I say -- I made my choice and am content with it.

((Researching a character with real-world beliefs is HARD. I'm glad the others I have either believe in religions I made up or are agnostic. Also glad I have friends who are Christians IRL, since I've always been terrified of offending someone while playing him, especially since stuff in the game world altered his beliefs pretty strongly.

I might edit this later -- I know I'm forgetting something))

Some Basic Setting Info and Commentary

First off, Zack is from a d20 Modern/Urban Arcana game that took a turn for the D&D about halfway through. In some respects Zack was the anti-badass -- he started out as the group's history/language geek, the token good character, who was middling-poor with a sword. He ended up still being a geek, but a geek with a (white) leather trenchcoat, a holy katana and (for a small point in the game) a celestial motorcycle. This was partially because the DM and I thought it was funny to have such an unlikely character. For the record, he is indeed a Paladin (I think his level breakdown was 4 Smart Hero/2 Dedicated Hero/1 Cleric/7 Prestige Paladin by the end.)

The DM liked to throw in references to other series in his games -- some of which I probably missed. A major NPC was a Belmont (of Castlevania fame), Lestet (of Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles) showed up once, a reference was made to Hatori Hanzo (Kill Bill), and Saint Peter was also involved. At Sages, or anywhere else, should Zack run into something relating to this, I'm going to assume that he knows enough to be reminded of it.

( History )